Saturday, January 31, 2009
Here is my drinking underage story. I moved to College when I was 18 so I was sober most of my entire first year. I had friends from back home coming to celebrate the last all ages event at Lulus which at the time was Canada's biggest bar.
There was a ride program on the way into the parking lot and the Police asked if I had been drinking, I said I had a drink and then they gave me a $125 ticket. I wasn't driving just a passenger.
So then instead of paying the full price of the fine, I wrote the Ministry of Justice a letter saying that $125 seems a bit much for having a beer underage. I sent them a cheque for $60 and explained in the letter that a took one left beer from my Omma's birthday party. I was trying to play up the foreigner not knowing the rules angle.
The Ministry of justice then sent a letter to my parents house. My mom having got letters from them before thought it was for jury duty, Now I can't remember if she opened it or not. I don't think she did. She just called the ministry and was all like "My son is a student he can't do jury duty." They were all "We don't want your son for jury duty." Then my mom opened the letter and I saw that they wanted the extra $65 for my drinking underage charge.
I got home from school and my roommate was all "You need to check the messages." There was my mom and she was not impressed. I called her and she started to cry and she was yelling at me. She always cried when her little angel, Marky D got in trouble but it only happened a couple times.
So Isobelle drove me to pay the rest of the ticket and on the way out of the parking lot a drove into a transport truck wheel and gently hit her head off the horn of her car and it made a beep. Everything and everyone was okay but I laughed for an hour straight. A fitting end to a stupid situation.
Friday, January 30, 2009
1) I live for rules.
2) What a pussy the friend is, getting another guy to ask for him. I could see using a girl as a decoy but getting a male friend to ask LOSER!
3) What if they had been banned from the Beer Store already? All the people at the Beer Store know that I am the guy that buys a 12 pack of Rickard's White. Adding something suspicious to my order could get me in hot water
4) I didn't have fake ID so I suffered. I like others to suffer as well.
Tomorrow I will tell you about the time I got caught for drinking underage. It's a go one.
Thursday, January 29, 2009
I found out yesterday my tied for first favourite sister, Carolyn and her son, my third favourite nephew, Aven from B.C. will be in town for my birthday this year (March 8,) FUN!
Like the ranking? Come on we all rate our favourites, even our family members. I just publicize mine.
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
This Peta commercial was banned by NBC and will not air in the Superbowl this weekend as intended. Peta's advertising is generally over the top. I don't think pretty girls rubbing vegetables are over they're bodies is going make most men drop their chicken wing and stick only to the carrots. Also shouldn't Peta be spending their money to educate and stop cruelty to animals instead of buying time in the Superbowl.
One thing I don't like about the gym is people who don't sanitize the machine afterwards. This one dude today was touching everything and not wiping the machines down. I even put two bottles of sanitizer beside him while he was working out. I am going to start to pre and post wipe all machines.
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
You've seem the likable Galen Weston, the likbale executive chairman of Loblaws, which owns, Loblaws, Superstores,Zehrs, No Frills, etc.
Well today in Toronto my local Loblaws which I visit on occasion was shut down for various public safety offenses.
Citing a major vermin infestation including rats and mice (including droppings on shelves,) "failure to protect food from contamination" and failing to "properly wash surfaces." Barf, vomit, puke.
I used to buy produce on occasion from this location. Totally bull shit.
Yummy! Tostitos has a new zesty bean and cheese salsa on supermarket shelves now. It's yummy and would be really good in homemade burritos. Mmmmmm. Burritos. It's good try it!
Sharing is caring!
Monday, January 26, 2009
Did you know he developed a stutter as a child from stress after his parent's divorced and shipped him off to his grandmothers. He was so embarrassed he didn't speak for 12 years until a teacher made him read a poem he wrote out loud. He didn't stutter, got his confidence back and joined the theater. I found that amazing! One of the most recognizable voices in the world not speaking for 12 years. I can barely go 35 seconds without speaking.
It's up for the best song Oscar up against 2 songs from Slumdog, including one from my favourite M.I.A. Those Academy members have a tough choice ahead of them.
Sunday, January 25, 2009
Click here to complain which I will do for the next 3-7 days (the amount of time it takes me to get over being annoyed.)
Saturday, January 24, 2009
Yesterday I went to the lazy eye specialist for the first time in 3 years. He told me my lazy eye is unfixable. He also said I have develop an astigmatism in one of my eyes now.
I guess I should start looking for a spouse with vision problems. Could you imagine waking up to someone who could only look at you with one eye while the other one is staring up at the ceiling. Oh what a minute I am not selling my self that good. I hear lazy eyes are 2009's answer to skinny jeans and scarves.
Thursday, January 22, 2009
Ha Ha Ha (get it, 40 year old virgin.) So Kelly Clarkson has released the first single off her comeback album coming out sometime soon I guess I don't really know. It's good. It ain't no Since you been gone but is better than anything on her last album, which she wrote herself. Pig farmer's from the South should let other people write their lyrics I say.
I never read the viewer comments but these one's were actually pretty funny, let's discuss
numero uno [number one] on iTunes!!!!!!
and i totally agreee!!
Mark says: Thanks beboploser Thanks for explaining to us what numero uno means. I would never have guessed. Now what does beboploser mean?
wooooo i hate this song lol jks its awsome!!!!!
Mark says: Devoid222 you snake, you got us again. We actually thought you be realz. Hey playa!
Mark says: TokioHotelLvr1, what could Kelly do to get the other 2.8 points she needs to get the full 100. I think Kelly would appreciate it for personal development.
Glad someone make good music,yet
I like it,and those people who said "some things"Whats your problem?Don't write this respectless comments,when you don't like her!
I love her & her music, shes something special
And I will always hear her music,doesn't matter whether reagge,rock,pop,country or whatever.
Its her voice which touch me everytime,which make every song beautiful,yes,I think that's it!
Mark says: Kukoo, Kukoo (I edited this one down a bit.) Those people who be talkin' "some things" better watch out or I be doing "some things' back to them. While I be doing "some things" I will be hearing Kelly Clarkson no matter if she regaee, polka, spoken word, whatever.
That was fun. Matybe a new feature.
Some random guy left the area we were in to use the washroom, I blamed it on him. I blamed my friends and I blamed a waitress. I even used a dirty bar public washroom, which had no lock on the stall. I had to keep it closed with my foot. Disgusting. The kicker of this is that I didn't have to even drop the kids off at the pool. I just thought perhaps I should it a go.
We switched bars and went to Sneaky Dees for nachos. I thought I was going to get off and then it happened again as we were leaving. Shitballs! Michelle made a comment about the resurgence of smell. Joni denied that she smelt it. So I naturally blamed her again for the smell. I am an asshole. But it was pretty funny.
I don't what caused me to smell that way. I was eating my regular healthy food. Maybe working out? Perhaps it was a form of my body detoxing for all the fitness frollocks I am giving it. Maybe it was the protein shakes I just started or could it be the old wine I drank before the bar. Who knows. I am happy to report that this morning I was back to good form and no smell.
To recap: Remember who ever smelt it, dealt it (then apologize later.)
"The Curious Case of Benjamin Button"
Anne Hathaway, "Rachel Getting
Angelina Jolie, "Changeling"
Melissa Leo, "Frozen River"
Meryl Streep, "Doubt"
Kate Winslet, "The Reader"
Frank Langella, "Frost/Nixon"
Sean Penn, "Milk"
Brad Pitt, "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button"
Mickey Rourke, "The Wrestler"
Richard Jenkins, "The Visitor"
BEST SUPPORTING ACTRESS
Amy Adams, "Doubt"
Penelope Cruz, "Vicky Cristina Barcelona"
Viola Davis, "Doubt"
Taraji P. Henson, "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button"
Marisa Tomei, "The Wrestler"
BEST SUPPORTING ACTOR
Josh Brolin, "Milk"
Robert Downey Jr., "Tropic Thunder"
Philip Seymour Hoffman, "Doubt"
Heath Ledger, "The Dark Knight"
Michael Shannon, "Revolutionary Road"
Danny Boyle, "Slumdog Millionaire"
Stephen Daldry, "The Reader"
David Fincher, "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button"
Ron Howard, "Frost/Nixon"
Gus Van Sant, "Milk"
BEST ORIGINAL SCREENPLAY
Dustin Lance Black, "Milk"
Courtney Hunt, "Frozen River"
Mike Leigh, "Happy-Go-Lucky"
Marttin McDonagh, "In Bruges"
Andrew Stanton, Jim Reardon, "WALL-E"
BEST ADAPTED SCREENPLAY
Simon Beaufoy, "Slumdog Millionaire"
David Hare, "The Reader"
Peter Morgan, "Frost/Nixon"
John Patrick Shanley, "Doubt"
Eric Roth, Robin Swicord, "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button"
BEST FOREIGN LANGUAGE FILM
"The Baader-Meinhof Complex" (Germany)
"The Class" (France)
"Waltz with Bashir" (Israel)
BEST ANIMATED FILM
"Kung Fu Panda"
BEST ART DIRECTION
"The Curious Case Of Benjamin Button"
"Changeling" Tom Stern
"Slumdog Millionaire," Anthony Dod Mantle
"The Reader," Chris Menges
"The Curious Case Of Benjamin Button," Claudio Miranda
"The Dark Knight," Wally Pfister,
BEST FILM EDITING
"The Curious Case of Benjamin Button," Kirk Baxter, Angus Wall
"The Dark Knight," Lee Smith
"Frost/Nixon," Daniel P. Hanley, Mike Hill
"Milk," Elliot Graham
"Slumdog Millionaire," Chris Dickens
BEST COSTUME DESIGN
"Australia," Catherine Martin
"The Curious Case Of Benjamin Button," Jacqueline West
"The Duchess," Michael O'Conner
"Milk", Danny Glicker
"Revolutionary Road," Albert Wolsky
BEST DOCUMENTARY FEATURE
"The Betrayal (Nerakhoon)"
"Encounters at the End of the World"
"Man on Wire"
"Trouble the Water"
BEST ORIGINAL SONG
"Slumdog Millionaire," "Jai Ho," A.R. Rahman
"Slumdog Millionaire," "O Saya," A.R. Rahman & M.I.A.
"Wall-E," "Down To Earth," Peter Gabriel & Thomas Newman
BEST ORIGINAL SCORE
"The Curious Case Of Benjamin Button," Alexandre Desplat
"Defiance," James Newton Howard
"Milk," Danny Elfman
"Slumdog Millionaire," A.R. Rahman
"WALL-E," Thomas Newman
"The Curious Case of Benjamin Button," Colleen Callaghan, Fionagh Cush
"The Dark Knight," Peter Robb-King, John Caglione Jr.
"Hellboy II: The Golden Army," Mike Elizalde, Thom Floutz
BEST SOUND EDITING
"The Dark Knight," Richard King
"Iron Man," Frank Eulner, Christopher Boyes
"Slumdog Millionaire," Tom Sayers
"Wall-E," Ben Burtt, Matthew Wood
"Wanted," Wylie Stateman
BEST SOUND MIXING
"The Curious Case of Benjamin Button," Mark Weingarten, David Parker, Michael Semanick, Ren Klyce
"The Dark Knight," Ed Novick, Lora Hirschberg, Gary Rizzo
"Slumdog Millionaire," Ian Tapp, Richard Pryke and Resul Pookutty
"Wall-E," Ben Burtt, Tom Myers, Michael Semanick
"Wanted," Chris Jenkins, Frank A. Montaño and Petr Forejt
BEST VISUAL EFFECTS
"The Curious Case of Benjamin Button," Eric Barba
"The Dark Knight," Chris Corbould, Nick Davis, Paul Franklin, Tim Webber
"Iron Man," John Nelson
BEST LIVE ACTION SHORT FILM
"Auf der Strecke (On the Line)"
"Manon on the Asphalt"
BEST ANIMATED SHORT FILM
"La Maison en Petits Cubes"
"Lavatory - Lovestory"
"This Way Up"
BEST DOCUMENTARY SHORT FILM
"The Conscience of Nhem En""The Final Inch" "Smile Pinki" "The Witness - From the Balcony of Room 306"
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
Or maybe she has got us all fooled and is a crazy party animal. I guess only time will tell.
I missed the whole Obama love fest. Oh well. Cleaning night didn't even start until after 10:30pm. I am happy to report its all done now.
Monday, January 19, 2009
It got up to 1640 views before going the way of the Dingo.
Sunday, January 18, 2009
The one thing I don't like about this gym (and any other gym) is the locker room. Like tonight I bent over to tie up my shoes and their was a 70 year old asshole (like a mean literally) asshole in front of my face. There are no benches only step stools to tie up shoes. It will be nice when it warms up as I live 3 blocks away and there won't be snow on my shoes. Also there are common towels for wiping off machines. I don't think this is sanitary. I will be addressing my concerns about cleanliness to management.
Check out my membership photo (hello mug shot!)
Then we went to the Second Cup with our David's Tea cups in hand, but the door was locked so I made the run back to the first floor of work. I made the Flay jay walk. I am an asshole but atleast it all work out in the end.
Saturday, although I was under the weather I was out in the cold for 3 hours looking for new boots. I had to go the washroom 5 times. That's a lot of grande Wild Sweet Orange Teas, which also could have led to the washroom breaks. Cold weather sucks.
Saturday, January 17, 2009
Although many of them are products of China and India (Not Europe) the quality is still really good.
Friday, January 16, 2009
I came home from the bar last night, went number 1, the cold always makes me have to. Then I brushed my teeth, washed my face and wrapped myself up in duvet love with full clothes on. I think my body just shut down because of the cold. This morning I was super late for work. I couldn't bear the thought of getting out from under said duvet.
Then I found out the Subway was shutdown and line ups for shuttle buses were massive and people were pushing. So I decided to do the 45 minute walk in -25 weather. With no street lights cabs were no where to be found.
I also shouldn't have gotten ready for work in the dark. Good thing for nice co-workers who told me I had white marks all over my sweater (I dried it on a old clothes rack, it must have been dusty.) She also said I had a mud like substance on my hood. Although we couldn't re-locate it. I also spilled coffee down my pants (good thing for tide to go and lysol wipes.) My co-worker told me not to worry though as people wouldn't be looking at stains since my jeans were doing all the right things in all the right places. People wouldn't see the now minor stains. Ha!
When I finally got to work I was freezing cold all morning until for lunch I pigged out on Garlic Bread, Soup, fries and club wrap from Swiss Chalet.
I got home from work at 7:30 and the power was back on so that was good!
Myself, my pussy (Mya) and my testicles thank Toronto Hydro. One good thing is that the black out defrosted my old crappy fridge which very much so needed it!
I'll catch up on more blogs tomorrow.
Wednesday, January 14, 2009
Here are some tips to warm up in the cold weather:
1) Tea does a body good. Drink lots of it to warm up
2) Wear big sweaters (preferably striped)
3) Be active while outside, it will get your body heat rising. (grrr.)
4) Red wine always warms the cockles of my heart
5) Crank the heat (or atleast turn it on in my case)
6) Bundle up. That means hat, scarves, gloves and boots. Ladies if your ass is hanging out of your coat, it's going to freeze.
7) Take slip, trip or fall. The ground is cold.
8) A hot shower before bed is always nice.
9) Winter is a nice time to check up on full seasons of TV shows you just discovered.
10) Dance often.
Also it's going to be cold until atleast the end of March. Don't be a hibernater. Having a social life and getting out is great for the mind and body.
Tuesday, January 13, 2009
I have worn size 34 pants my whole life. I always have. I flirted in an earlier post about dropping a waist size but then I measured my waist with a tool tape measure and it ended up being 35 inches so I thought I should just stay at 34.
Then co-workers of mine were talking about how Elvis' waist was 34 inches. I said that Elvis and I had the same size waist. They looked at me as though I was retarded and said I am definitely not a 34. I did tell them that I can just most of my pants off without undoing them or my belt. The looks of retardation continued.
Tonight to test it out I was able to stick a roll of duct in the waist of my 34 inch pants. I guess I should go and get properly measured so I know for sure.
Here is Fever Ray's awesome new video to "If a had a heart. It pretty eye catching"
Also my iMac replacement keyboard finally came. I have been without it for 2 weeks. Happy to have a new good one back home. I hate the Apple Store though.
Here is a photo of Mya Pussy and I celebrating.
Monday, January 12, 2009
Slumdog swept the Golden Globes which means I will probably be seeing it again with my favourite sister in law Marcia. She has young kids so to maximize her away time we see 2 Oscar nominated films on the same day some weekend in in February. It's always a good time. Except when last year I think I suffered a minor heart attack during the chase scene in No Country for Old Men. I love that movie. Heart attack and all. I think I like Slumdog better though.
I was re-telling the story to friends this weekend and said "I ran into some Americans they were singing the American theme song, Jose, can you see by the donserly light..." "Are you joking?" My friends said. Those are not the words. I always thought it was Jose and Donserly. I had no idea who Jose was or what a donserly light meant but I have always thought those were the words.
Here are the real lyrics, for you other retards out there:
O! say can you see
by the dawn's early light
What so proudly we hailed
at the twilight's last gleaming.
Whose broad stripes and bright stars
through the perilous fight,
O'er the ramparts we watched
were so gallantly streaming.
And the rockets' red glare,
the bombs bursting in air,
Gave proof through the night
that our flag was still there.
Oh, say does that star-spangled banner yet wave
O'er the land of the free and the home of the brave?
Sunday, January 11, 2009
Here is my favourite song from Slugdog which won Screenplay, Motion Picture Drama, Director and score.
I only remembered He-Man, She-ra and Skeletor. Also who ever wrote that show must of been on serious drugs looking back now.
Every episode ended with a helpful tip for kids.
Here is some life lessons from He-Man himself.
She will also be back in June for a brother's wedding.
I've been brushing up on my Aussie. So Katie from your Dag brother Mark, Have a dinky-dee time. Hopefully you don't have any earbashing people beside you on your 30 hour flight. Your trip will for sure not be a shit house. You will have beaut time for sure. I lurve you (please note: Only one Aussie says lurve.)
I found a similar one online. Click here to see it. I don't want the actual photo on my site.
Thursday, January 8, 2009
Tonight in Toronto I saw the Wrestler. It was really good. I used to love WWE growing up. So I knew I would probably like this.
It's the story about a former champ wrestler who is past his prime wrestling in local leagues now remarkably played by Mickey Rourke. He befriends an aging stripper, played by Marissa Tomei who has her boobs hanging out for 99% of her scenes. Great rack!
Critics are calling this Mickey Rourke's comeback movie. It probably is but I think the way he messed up his face with plastic surgery will hurt him in the long run. It works for a wrestler but probably not for an old romantic lead. Grow old gracefully people and don't squint in the sun. It causes crows feet!
D-List actors should not get plastic surgery. If you can't pay for the best don't get it!
"How'd I turn my shirt inside out." From Just Dance
"Let's have some fun, this beat is sick, I want to take a ride on your disco stick." From Lovegame
"I'm your biggest fan I'll follow you until you love me. Pappa-Papparazzi. " From Papparazzi (is she trying to praise the Paps so that they will follow her?)
"I want to hold them like they do in Texas, please."
"Russian Roulette is not the same without a gun."
"I won't tell you that I love you, kiss or hold you, cause I'm bluffin with my muffin."
From Poker Face (My personal fav. Pa Pa Pa Poker Face.)
"My eyes turn from kinda blue to kinda blue, heya."
From Again Again
"Boys, boys, boys, we like boys in cars. Boys, boys, boys buy us drinks in bars."
From Boys, Boys Boys
"If everything, was everything but everything is over.
Everything could be everything if only we were older."
From Brown Eyes
"Ah-Get your ass in my bed!
Baby you’ll be, just my summer boyfriend, Summer Boy"
From Summer Boyfriend
Here is the video to Poker Face
3:08 - She sings to a big dog
3:11 - best dance move, Peekaboo. I am adding this to dance move repatiore.
That would be one cold little willy.
Wednesday, January 7, 2009
Here are some reasons why my dad is rad:
1) He is probably the nicest person I know. He loves to spoil people with trearts, such as chocolates, ice cream, treats and alcohol. I usually always get sent home with a good bottle of wine and a couple 20s.
2) We are basically the same person. Paranoid, a little nervous, safety cautious, appreciators of alcohol. We both love to cook and entertain, non drama and sometimes easy going. Anybody like me has got to cool. Although since we are so similar we have been know the bump heads before.
3) Seniors discount for me!
4) My dad are b0th have crazy laughs. I laugh like Eddie Murphy but longer, louder and harder and his laugh, well I can only describe it has someone who has peanuts stuck up their nose and can't get air out of them. It's a good one. At his party Saturday, people were actually requesting him to laugh. I never knew. This happens to me all the time to which we say "Say something funny bitch."
5) He used to be spoil me and my 5 siblings when my mom who is a nurse worked nights. This usually meant large candy canes, drumsticks, lick-a-colour popsicles and Miss Vicki's. All from the Brantford Whole Sellers.
6) He is a fighter rebounding from a heart attack, by-pass sugery and prostate cancer all in the last 15 years.
7) He is shorter than my mom. Good for him for being man enough to marry a tall lady.
8) He is an awesome interior decorator, everyone needs to know one. Call me. I will hook you up.
Now here is a photo of my dad smoking, while drinking a beer out of glass while skateboarding down an incline into traffic. Tomorrow I will post a scandalous photo of my dad, as I am leaving and can't find it now. Anyhow...
Happy Bday Dad!
Tuesday, January 6, 2009
Tonight in Toronto I saw Slumdog Millionaire. It was so good. It came highly recommended. Danny Boyle of Trainspotting fame did an amazing job as director and the film was beautiful to watch.
2 versions of M.I.A's Paper Planes were included in the film and it even ended with a Bollywood dance number. I love Bollywood dance numbers.
Speaking of dance numbers, me and the alley backup dancer will be rehersing a new one in the coming weeks and it sure to be a bigger hit then my previous one (check the lucious links section if you don't know what I am speaking of.)
Happy Oscar Season!
So for Christmas from my union, CEP 723M (I have no idea what any of that means) gave me a $30 gift certificate for Metro. First of all. I hate Metro. It's super expensive and they have those annoying baskets people drag behind them which are hard to get around. Although I still appreciate the gift I thought I would just try a few products my normal No Frills and Loblaws don't carry. I stumbled across frozen stuffed crust pizza which was good.
Today I made burgers from Chris and Tal's called the Bet-ter Burger. It was a burger made from half beef and half soya. So you get the beef taste but it is 65% less fat. It was good. Try it out.
Monday, January 5, 2009
Here is a clip of Mr. G's musical which was originally named after Anabelle Dixon a student who recently died of a drug overdose. Anabelle's parents complained so Mr. G changed the girl's name to Jessica and then called the show Mr. G the musical. Although he didn't know Anabelle it's all about how he tried to stop her from using drugs. He is a clip
1) In grade school I climbed a fence in the winter and slid off it and fell through a wooden compost box and split my head open to 2 different place. I still have visible scars that can be seen when my hair is cut short as no hair grows there.
2) Once I was chasing my sister Laura up the stairs, I caught my baby toe on the corner of the wall leading to the stairs and ripped my toe out and too the side. It was gross. I barfed a lot after this.
3) In grade four I was racing some girl named Heather, she tripped me and I went flying head first into a brick wall. I still have a bump on the corner of my head that never went away. This needed stitches as well. Actually the janitor had to bleach the entire floor of the school due to my blood trail.
4) When I was much younger we were vacationing in a trailer at Darrien Lake and I rolled off a top bunk and bashed my head off the floor. I had a concussion.
There's lots more but we will save that for another day. So many head injuries. It's amazing that I ended up as cool as I am.
Sunday, January 4, 2009
2009 is destined to be a good year. Already in the first quarter I get to send my sister Katie off to Australia, Go to Cuba for a friends wedding, see my favourite band, The Switch play Super Market and I get to go for my G1 license again for bar ID. I am so not a driver right now. I am too busy looking at billboards and people while driving.
My brother Dave is also getting married in July so that will be a fun time. Cheers to 2009!
This has happened before. I won't leave with food cooking again. I think this was my last strike. Now I now. Good thing my dad doesn't read my blog. He would have a shit fit. He is totally safety first.
1) Don't want to sweat the bar out the morning after a bar night. Down the grapefruit juice to eliminate unpleasant pore leakage. Thanks Nick!
2) I walk atleast 2 hours a day and climb about 1,000 stairs (I do double stairs in the afternoon.) Keep your feet and shoes smelling new by spraying with unscented deodorant. It works miracles.
3) Don't serve Doritos at parties (I love Doritos) people were lick their fingers and then go back for more. Gross.
4) Don't facebook, call or text after the bar. Whatever you wanted to say it's not that important and likely will not come across how you meant it.
5) Don't squint in the sun, you are asking for crow's feet. Sun protection people.
6) Ch-Ch-Ch Charmin toilet paper is so worth the extra money
7) Have salad with every dinner. I make big salads Sundays and Wednesdays. You need to have 5-10 veggies a day. Drink lots of water too. The minimum is 8 glasses. I do twenty.
8) Be active. It may suck at first but you will see results and feel better.
9) Remember to not take yourself too seriously. I'm a little crazy with schedules and paranoia but I can still laugh at myself.
10) Work a job you love. I love my job and co-workers.
My childhood best friend, Pat and his parents came to my dad's party and when they saw this photo they recalled the time they took my to a cottage and I followed Pat, who was an all-star hockey player down a steep hill on rollerblades. I was still having issues walking so my rollerblading skills were even more vomitable. I fell on the hill which at the end led to a rocky cliff and skidded down on butt. I burned all the skin off my leg from my ass crack to below my knee. Pat's mom who is also a nurse sprayed it with solarcane. It burned and freaking hurt so Pat told me to run the the pain off. I started running around the cottage and almost tripped and fell down a ravine. I barely held on. Yep, I'm a spaz.
A week later Pat's mom picked us up from seeing Ace Ventura: Pet Detective. We were on a double date. During the movie I tripped on the rope lights that lined the aisles and fell face first into the bottom of a metal movie seat and all of a sudden had a hole the size of a penny below my bottom lip. I didn't want Pat's mom to know or my parents so I hid it from his mom in the car. I think after a week of cleaning my butt she was pretty much done with me anyhow. At home I put a bandaid over it thinking my Parent's wouldn't notice. My dad sure did and then I got in trouble. Here is a photo of that scar.
I have scars all over. Whoa! Long post. I had more injuries to talk about. I will save that for tomorrow.
I love kids. Especially nephews and those that are not crying. It was priceless. Ian loves Old McDonald's chicken nugget happy meal best.
Saturday, January 3, 2009
Special thanks to my mom and siblings Laura and Marcia who helped put tons with organizing, food and invitations. Marcia made a video with tons of pictures of us. My favourite was me in the video. I was freaking cute as a kid.
The other siblings helped out too. Dave picked up the food. Katie helped set up, Tim made a speech, Carolyn and Aven sent their love from B.C. and I was DJ. Yes, I have a ginantic family. I played my dad's favourite bands including Ronnie Hawkins, The Band, Chicago and Blood, Sweat and Tears.
Unky Mark was put too work as one of the only people who could rescue hellium balloons from the ceiling of the hall. I think the Unky Mark theme song also needs a few new lines. Here it is so far:
Unky Mark, Unky Mark
He's going to get the battery and save the day.
He's not to big and he's not to tough (Mark note: I have never liked this line!)
But when we work together
We got the right stuff.
Only me could end a Birthday post to my dad with a song about me. based on the Wonder Pets TV theme song. My oldest brother made this up when a battery fell out a sea-doo at his in-law's cottage and then nephews were concerned. I rescued it from the bottom of the lake. Yep, I'm amazing.
Dad's real birthday is Wednesday. Full Bday tribute and incriminating photos then.
Friday, January 2, 2009
I didn't want to open the blinds and have what I thought could be a burlger shoot me in the face. So I tried to picked out the side of the blinds, I couldn't really see anything. Then I decided to prepare myself if a break were to happen. Weapons! I thought first. I found a hammer and a butcher knife. I was going to bring them to the bedroom with me. Then I remember that I am accident prone and have never been in a true fight that it may be better if I run, if needed. The likelyhood of me tripping and stabbing myself would have been high.
So I grabbed my winter coat and put it in my bedroom, I got Mya Pussy's carrier and left it open on the floor just in case. Grabbed both my work and personal cell phones. I also put on some clothes (it's cold outside) and made sure that my bedroom window wasn't frozen in case I had to make the one storey drop with Mya Pussy in tow. It did. So I was all set should the burlger try to break and enter. The last thing I remember is coming up with ideas why my 2 neighbours are more thieft friendly (lawyer, roomates = more stuff and every burgler loves ladies!!!)
Then I awoke at 10am this morning. Everything was safe and sound. I have no idea what the noise was outside. But now atleast I have an escape route should I need one. Yes, I am a spazz.
Thursday, January 1, 2009
My favourite character is Pat Mullins (I couldn't find a good video of her.) She was born with one leg longer than the other so she rolls everywhere.
Usually I don't make resolutions but this year I did, they are:
1) Exercise more (and join the gym)
2) Sleep less (it's hard when you love your bed)
3) Stay in more and drink a little less (my liver would approve)
4) Do some courses so I can do my job better (this would be nice.)
Good luck to all of you on your resolutions!